What Others Don't Know

To say that I am grateful for a week off for Thanksgiving is an understatement! I did not realize just how exhausted I was until I was able to sleep in a bit on Monday. Prior to leaving work on Friday, I was certain to make sure that all of my lesson plans had been completed so that I could truly enjoy my time away. As I am writing this post, it is 4:45am on Monday morning and I will be returning to work in just a couple of hours.

When I woke up this morning, I thought about all I was able to accomplish on my week off. One thing most educators try to do is schedule appointments during breaks because they are very difficult to do during the week when school is in session. Both my Love and I were able to get in a few needed doctor's appointments.

Love tends to have most of his appointments handled through the Veteran's Administration Hospital since he served in the military. I am not fond of how the VA treats its veterans but he insists on having his medical care done there so not much I can do about that. At this recent appointment however, something very different happened that gave me pause.

For this particular appointment, the VA used a hospital affiliate location. When we checked in for Love's appointment the lady at the desk asked him if he was a veteran, to which he replied, "yes, Ma'am." She thanked him for his service and then asked, "is this your wife?" Love again replied, "yes, Ma'am." She then said to me, "we so often forget to thank the wives of our service members because you all must sacrifice as well. So, thank you for your service."

Love and I have been together now for over fifteen years and I do not recall anything like that ever happening to me before. What she said stayed with me for most of the day and apparently it is still with me since I am writing about it this morning nearly a week later! When I met Love, he was no longer on full active duty but was serving in the Reserves at the time we met.

I have never given much thought to any service or sacrifice I have made being in a relationship with a veteran. Giving it some thought after the receptionist thanked both Love and I, I came to realize that while Love and I were not together while he was on active duty, what many may never understand is that long after service members have left the military, there are still battles to fight. Many service members are left with unseen scars and trauma that literally last a lifetime.

Since Love and I have been together I have watched him deal with residual stress from being in the military. Generally, he is only able to sleep three or four hours a night. Which means I only get to sleep three or four hours a night. He has spent countless hours meeting with doctors and military personnel to get disability services he needs.

As of just last week, he continues to need medical treatment for issues that have since developed and it takes so many appointments just to deal with one thing. One of the appointments he had last week was our second attempt to get it taken care of. At the end of the appointment, we again have to reschedule because the order was not written correctly from his doctor at the VA. Therefore, the outside provider could not complete the procedure.

I absolutely do not think of the time I take to care for Love as a sacrifice. What he did for this country and what he continues to do for our family allows me to support him with anything he needs. Veteran's are a special breed of people and I am very grateful for mine!

Hopefully, the powers that be will work harder to create a better place for veteran's to get the care they need without them having to jump through hoops. For the sacrifices they made, veteran's totally deserve better.